I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
