It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize
