U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Randomize
