This is not my ceiling
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
