let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize