i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
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