my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
