Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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