oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
