Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
