dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
