Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize