hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize