found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
i drank out of a bidet.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
