You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
