I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
