everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
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