Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
