would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
The air was thick with penises
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize
