home. puking in laundry basket.
so let's talk penis.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
