i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
