i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
