I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
