Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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