her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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