Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
