Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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