So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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