So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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