Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
