He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize
