My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
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