the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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