was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
