Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
