she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
