Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
