I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
NoShamevember. You game?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
