i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I hate all girls vehemently.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
