They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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