handjob tips. give me some.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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