I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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