..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
So many bounce houses so little time
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
