I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize
