HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
not ubering you a puppy
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Randomize
