do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Randomize
