So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Randomize
