Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
