New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
