Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Randomize
